‘He’s going the distance’

He's going for speed
He’s going for speed

When is a humblebrag more humble than brag? When there’s video proof!

After a week of grey skies and soggy ground, the sun is out. My office has an informal, lunch-hour 40-yard dash competition each year, and I was around for it this year. I didn’t fare too badly–5.81 and 5.83 in my two tries–and I was feeling pretty good considering I’m that 37, a good 10 pounds heavier than I should be, and wearing jeans.

Then I saw the video posted by my co-worker. To the tape!

Clearly, I was never a sprinter. Did my feet ever get more than six inches off the ground? Can I blame that on wearing jeans? How much of an unfair advantage did my $10 aviators provide me?These questions need answers!

Here’s the second run, since you asked: